Ryan is a dressage horse, though a coward by tradition,
So I thought that I might enter him in a dressage competition.
I’m sure he’ll do it very well, the best horse in the show,
The only problem being that he will not want to go.
Ryan knows his dressage paces, and I know he’s very able,
But come the morning of the show, he’ll be hiding in his stable.
There’s a knocking in the horsebox, is the engine ’bout to seize?
Try looking in the back, Yes, it’s Ryan’s knocking knees.
With the dressage judges waiting, we’ll explain we’re very sorry,
“Yes, I’d like to do the test, but he won’t come out the lorry”.
Then he’ll have a little pep talk with the Vicar and the Vet,
Then he’ll bravely leave the lorry, then he’ll break out in a sweat.
Ryan enters the arena, In at ‘A’ in working trot,
He stops at ‘X’, his mind is blank, the test he has forgot.
“Don’t look at me”, I’ll say to him, while sitting on his back,
You’re the so called dressage horse, I only want to hack.
By John Peters